CONFESSION OF A DISCIPLE by Mark Dino, NDE

One of my routines everyday before going to work is to read a chapter of John Maxwell’s book ‘The 21 Most Powerful Minutes in a Leader’s Day’.  And in one of the chapters I was struck by the following:

“When God is involved, it’s not necessarily the giftedness of the leader that prompts God’s blessing; it’s more often the leader’s willingness to move when & where He indicates.” – John Maxwell (from The 21 Most Powerful Minutes in a Leader’s Day)

I’ve also experienced the Lord’s blessing in the same way, and I would like to share my reflection about it — not as a leader, but as a disciple who desires to faithfully follow the Lord.

Three years ago, I heard the Lord prompting me to once again serve Him through the community. You see, I was at a point when I didn’t want to pursue community life any more.  So when I heard the Lord calling me, I was really not inclined to obey… simply because (nakakahiya mang aminin) I’m not a confident person. I would always avoid serving by pointing to another person and say, ‘Sya na lang Lord, he can do it better anyway.  Di ko kaya yan.’

For quite some time, that would work.  The Lord would just let me have it my way.   He would call.  I would plead and avoid.  But then the Lord, with all His love, desires my growth; and so He would get back to me calling me to serve yet again and again.  He wouldn’t stop.  And each time, I would look at my ungiftedness, and beg off.

Finally the Lord said,  “Mark, what I’m asking from you is your availability. Are you willing to make yourself available for me?”    I couldn’t say No to that.

I started attending prayer meetings of Ang Lingkod ng Panginoon. My first service was playing the guitar during the worship because that is the only service that I know how to do decently well.  I was content in serving in the music ministry then.  But the Lord had a plan for me to grow, and He knew that I wouldn’t grow just by doing what I wanted to do.   And so, through my leader, the Lord called me to take another step in serving him.  I was asked to lead a prayer meeting.  I begged to be assigned to a prayer meeting three months from that day.   Then came a series of requests for service — each service involving an area that I’m not familiar with, nor confident to do because I know I’m not good at it or not gifted with it. And each and every time, the Lord would only ask me for one thing – my availability.

Looking back now, I’m thankful for every step of service that God called me to. For each commitment of availability that I made with the Lord, I was blessed more than anyone else. I learned new skills, I grew in character, and I was able to witness to my brothers and sisters.  Best of all, I was serving not man but God. 

Going back to Maxwell’s words, my conviction grew even more knowing that our God blesses those who are willing to step out of our comfort zone in order to please the Lord, willing to be used by the Lord despite insecurities of our incapabilities.  The very disposition of putting ourselves at the disposal of the Lord plays a big factor for God to bless us.   It’s ironic that when we give ourselves away for service, we realize at the end of the day, it is us who are blessed all the more.

I believe that God’s equation is: service = blessing.  Blessed, not in the material sense, but blessed in the sense that we can truly ask for whatever means it takes to do our service well, and He will grant it.  The Lord will supply the necessary grace that we need to do our service well.

“If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.” (Lk 9: 23-24)

The bottom line: God desires that his people may have life to the full.  God desires to bless his people – his only requirement: our willingness to make ourselves availabile for His sake.

My experience says, when we give ourselves away for the service of the Lord, we are transformed, we are changed, and we are blessed.

– Mark Dino  (North District E, and Branch Leader for Lingkod, Quezon City)

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